Sometimes, I impress even myself

This entry has been written from an ‘out of character’ perspective to explain how I fail spectacularly…

Occasionally I am reminded that despite playing EVE for eight years now, I can be utterly terrible at this game.  Never more than when it comes to making ISK.  Space-rich I have never really been.

Partly because I don’t tend to put much effort in, partly because I go about things in my own unique ‘style’.  Although I have been in Factional Warfare for a couple of months now (it goes fast!) I haven’t really run the missions much at all, despite being well aware of how lucrative they are.

Tonight I decided to (attempt to) do it properly and pulled up the rather nice little guide that an alliance mate put together on the Ushra’Khan forums.  I boarded my hound (not the recommended Purifier as it is clearly non-Minmatar garbage) with my own ‘custom’ fitting and set off to collect up as many missions as I thought I could handle in one sitting.

I arrive in Ezzara and get to work on my first mission, ‘Halt the Invasion’.  All you have to do is blow up a stargate and speed tank everything else.  After being forced to warp out several times I finally managed to get it totally wrong and explode.  As it turns out, dual propulsion mod setups really are recommended.  Hmm.

Off to Rens I went and bought myself a new Hound.  This time I tweaked the fitting for more speed/agility, an afterburner to go with the MWD.

I headed back out with the new fitting and started completing some missions.  Much better.  After chomping through half a dozen missions, I finally encounter some unfriendly company.  A neutral Jaguar appears in my mission site 100km away.  I do the sensible thing and initiate warp.   But then a dark corner of my brain says… “But we only need to finish off two more Transport NPC’s…and he’s so far away…”

I cancel my warp.  The NPC’s fire another volley.  I explode.  The Jag is still 100km away from me.  I can be so special sometimes.

[21:46:01] Ugleb > hmm
[21:46:07] Ugleb > got distracted there
[21:46:13] Pasaremos > lol
[21:46:36] Ugleb > started warp, changed my mind, boom
[21:46:42] Pasaremos > 😀

I leave system in my pod with half a dozen completed missions under my belt.  The good news is that the LP I have earned so far will more than cover the cost of those two bombers and should compensate for the other three missions I won’t have time to complete.  As I am sorting out my autopilot waypoints to head home, my mail box blinks.

loot is still there
From: Pasaremos
Sent: 2012.09.09 21:50
To: Ugleb,

grab your loot. i didn’t take it becasue i found it too funny how you died :D.

Funnily enough, so did I!  I thanked him and told him to go ahead and loot my wreck if he can get past the Amarrian warships guarding it.  He might even discover the remains of my previous Hound’s fitting in there too, as I looted my own wreck after reshipping before…

After turning in my missions I had gained about 152,000 LP.  But wait, there’s more:

From: Minmatar Republic
Sent: 2012.09.09 22:10

For your efforts in fighting for the liberation of the Minmatar people, you have been promoted to the following rank: Blade Commander.

Truly, the Minmatar people are in good hands. 😉

This entry was posted in Factional Warfare & Low Sec, Out Of Character and tagged , . Bookmark the permalink.

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